I'm just living, laughing, & loving

• Lately, I feel stuck. I certainly don’t feel much like an adult at all.
• I know that it has a lot to do with living with my parents again.
• Even though it was a choice that we made, with full acceptance of what was coming, and this was voluntary, sometimes I can’t help but feel like a failure. 
• We put a bid on a short sale house. It’s taking forever.
• Truth be told, I only like it. It’s in a great neighborhood. It would be a great house to live in for a long time. I am just not in love with it. Something is keeping me from being excited about it, but I can’t put my finger on it.
• Part of me feels regret about putting up our first house for rent for 2 years. I still love that house. I’m really starting to miss it. 
• Then I have to smack myself back into reality, and remind myself, location, location, location. You hated where you lived. 
• So many of my friends are moving away. Portland, Detroit, Columbus, Raleigh, Charlotte, San Francisco. I’m starting to feel like there is nothing much left here for me.
• Yesterday, John and I had a big life discussion about making some big changes. Changes that will be good for us. No. It doesn’t involve babies. 
• It involves dropping this house bid, and moving elsewhere. And I’m kind of excited about it. I hope we can make things happen. 
• We only have to worry about finding John a job. My job would allow me to permanently work from home, which would be nice for the short term, while we got settled in a new area.
• I still hate my job. People and their stupidity make me unnecessarily angry. I find myself doing less and less of the “going above and beyond” thing. See yesterday’s post. Call me when you have a problem with the (redacted) program. Not when you can’t make your computer stop beeping at you.
• I hate my car. It’s a piece of junk, and falling more apart each day. I can’t keep up with fixing the warning lights that keep popping up. Sometimes I day dream of hitting black ice, and crashing my car into a tree, or getting rear ended. (Hey, I said I was being honest.)
• I really want a Volkswagen Passat TDI (Turbo Diesel)
• I feel like I’m not present on Tumblr much lately. I’m sorry for being distant. I think it’s because I live with my parents, and I feel like a loser and uninteresting.
• It’s also because my laptop broke, and wouldn’t charge. But John is awesome and gave me my birthday present a month early, a new laptop! Woot!
• I want to go back to school, to help get me out of my rut. Part of me would really like to finish my master’s for speech pathology & audiology, to work in a hospital setting for Traumatic Brain Injury and Stroke patient therapy. Part of me would really like to change it up. Nursing. X-ray/CT scan/MRI tech. I’m not sure what feels right.

I think this wraps up my thoughts for now. 

Maddie and Rocky just killed a possum in the back yard. I had to bathe a bloody dog. EEEUUGHHH SO GROSS. 

“Every time I receive an email my computer beeps. How do I stop that?”

Yeah. That’s not my problem. Good luck with that. I am not your computer bitch.

babybirdblue:

simplejulie said: I love the rug, where did you get it? Also, what color are the walls?

Sorry this took so long for me to answer. The rug we got off of overstock and the walls are Benjamin Moore waterfall, at least I’m pretty sure that is what it is. The paint can is Kelly Moore…

Thank you, my dear! Reblogging for *maybe new house* inspiration!

Out of an 8 person team, all but me, and work bff Allie have called off sick today.

• Only one of them has a valid reason, her dad is in the hospital. 
• Another put in her two weeks on Tuesday, so she’s pretty much using up her sick time between now and then.
• Someone else lives an hour away and said the roads were too bad. Whatever. There is an inch of snow, and you take the express way. So leave a little earlier than usual. This can’t be the first time you’ve driven in snow.
• Yet another told us that she called off to set up her new desk, so she can work from home! WTF! Tomorrow is the weekend. Do it then! That doesn’t require a sick day, you lazy ass.

I am so over this job and regularly having to take over the work of 3 other people. 

My last 5 or 6 posts, the note counts are off. One says there should be 11, there are 4. One says there should be 28, there’s actually 20. Yet another that says 11, there’s 9. It’s driving me crazy, and I think Tumblr is hiding messages from me! Has anyone else noticed this?